Coroner's office investigating what led to Orinda man's death

UPDATE Tuesday 8 a.m. A Contra Costa County Coroner's representative has said that Yee died of "blunt force trauma to the head," but that the "manner of death is pending." 

MONDAY: An autopsy was to be performed this morning on Joel Aaron Yee, 20, who died late Saturday night after flinging himself out of a car on Highway 24 between Lafayette and Walnut Creek.

A Contra Costa Coroner's deputy confirmed that the case is being treated as a possible suicide.

The California Highway Patrol said Yee jumped out of the passenger seat of a Honda Accord traveling 70 mph on westbound Highway 24 just east of Pleasant Hill Road. The incident occurred just after 11 p.m.

Yee landed on the right shoulder. After the Accord's driver and a passing motorist called 911, the motorist tried resuscitating him with CPR, but emergency crews declared him dead at the scene.

Medical expert explains how a healthy person can suddenly die from any flu and the difference between swine flu and regular flu

With news reports from Claycord.com and the Contra Costa Times saying that two more students at Concord's El Monte Elementary have flu-like symptoms--and that swine flu is a possible culprit, I thought I’d direct you to SFgate.com’s medical blogger, Jan Gurley, who explains how to tell the difference between regular flu and swine flu and how either one can kill an otherwise healthy person.

Gurley, a board-certified internist physician and health writer, is writing in response to the May 29 death of Karen Perez, a 9-year-old at El Monte Elementary. At the time of her death, she had been suffering from swine flu and a secondary bacterial infection.

Gurley begins her post by reminding readers that many people die from the regular flu every year “and most of us probably assume that those afflicted are only the very elderly or chronically ill.” One thing about the coverage of the swine flu (more officially known as H1N1 virus) and the death of Karen is that both remind us that even seemingly healthy young people can die from the flu.

Here are some key points she makes in her blog, which you can read here:

--The “flu” we usually get is actually a cold.
--Flu, in contrast to a cold, is “often described as initially making you feel as though you'd been hit by a bus - a whole body ache that not many other things can cause. “
-- On the other hand, swine flu is often described as NOT causing the whole-body ache.
-- Regular flu also often comes with a high fever of 101 degrees plus.
-- Any illness that progresses rapidly can kill you, whether its regular flu or swine flu. “So maybe you've had one day of the aches, a low grade temp and a little nausea—but if you progress in that one day from a wee bit of nausea to puking constantly, having watery diarrhea, and getting dizzy when you stand, you've got to help soon.
--“Any illness that makes you feel short of breath means you need a prompt evaluation.”
--With word that Perez also suffered a secondary bacterial infection, Gurley explains that this can happen with flu: “First, flu of all kinds causes your body to pump out flu-fighting glycoproteins (called cytokines) and special immune cells. This physiologic response is very specific to viruses. Unfortunately, the unintended consequence of -your body's eager flu reaction is that it can leave you very susceptible to bacterial infections.
--Her bottom line: "If something that feels like the flu is burning through your friends/famly/social group, be sure to watch yourself and others for rapidly progressing symptoms, an inability to keep fluids down (or in!), any shortness of breath, and any "new" symptoms after four to five days."

Plan to replace 1500 Newell with condo/retail complex (so far) receives thumbs up from neighbors, city planners

Walnut Creek city staff and downtown residents have given cautious support to a proposal to tear down the empty eight-story former bank building--otherwise known as 1500 Newell--and the building that currently houses the 7-Eleven store and replace them with a four-story, mixed-use condo and retail complex.

The new 128,575-square-foot complex, called the Village at 1500, would house 49 condo units on the upper three floors. Specifically, 19 of those 49 would be two-bedroom flats and 30 would be two-bedroom town homes. For residents, there would also been an outdoor pool, spa, clubhouse, and lounge.

This is according to a city staff report eing released in advance of Thursday night's Planning Commission meeting. You can view the report here.

According to the project, the developer is Alamo Essex, LLC. I earlier wrote that Alamo Essex is a joint venture that brings together two companies, the Alamo Group and the Essex Property Trust of Palo Alto, a publicly traded real estate investment trust. The Alamo Group has been involved in revitalization several projects in downtown Walnut Creek, including McCovey’s Restaurant, Maria Maria, 1515 Restaurant Lounge, and Bing Crosby’s Restaurant and Piano Lounge.

As for 1500 Newell, the proposal says that 10 percent of the residential units would be set as aside as “affordable” or “inclusionary” housing. Ten percent sounds impressive, but, four to five units. Is that enough?

On the ground floor there would be nearly 28,000-square-feet of retail space, including a 2,000 square-foot-restaurant.

One notable “site improvement” would be a “new pedestrian promenade” along Las Trampas Creek. “It is envisioned that this area will eventually be improved to provide a ‘natural’ walk along the channel, consistent with policies in the General Plan to enhance the creeks and natural resources of the City.”

Another notable feature would be that—unlike certain proposed luxury retail department stores we don’t need to mention—this new development would provide new parking in the form of two stories of underground parking.

For those who pay attention to whether the project complies with the city’s General Plan, the city staff report says it does—for the most part—in that it encourages a mix of commercial and residential uses in the downtown core area. Height-wise, the building rises 50 feet plus “small parapet extensions” and the rooftop stairwell. This height plus those extensions are in compliance with height exceptions for small “architectural embellishments.”

Possible sources of controversy?

--Well, of course, we’ll have to see what design the developers have come up with. Let’s hope it’s attractive.
--City planners are concerned about proposed sidewalk “improvements” along south Main Street, including the placement of planters and benches in the public right-of-way that could reduce the usable sidewalk area. Also, planners want the developer to make more effort to incorporate “green” building materials and features into their design.
--The city arborist has complained about the proposal to remove 11 trees , including several mature, healthy trees, to make way for construction. “The City Arborist does not support the removal of four red oak trees on South Main Street and recommends that every effort be made to preserve these trees.”
--Finally, neighbors from the nearby Parkmead Community Association generally support the project, but are concerned about an increase in traffic. A traffic analysis is currently underway.

With regard to the next step, planners recommend that the Planning Commission receive reports from the staff and developer and give the developer feedback.

If you have elderly parents or neighbors, how do you check up to make sure they are safe?

Like a lot of you, I’ve been reading the Contra Costa Times story about the ordeal of Walnut Creek’s Shirley Madsen. The woman, who just turned 90, survived being trapped in her bathtub for three days. She went to take a bath, but when she was done, this otherwise healthy active woman found she was suddenly too weak to pull herself out.

It's fair to say that the specifics of Madsen's ordeal are unusual, but, sadly, the general situation--elderly person injured or incapacited in their home and unable to call for help--is not. And, Walnut Creek is known for its older population. Twenty-five percent of Walnut Creek residents are 65 or older.

Here's what happened with Madsen:

On Wednesday May 27, she returned from a senior trip to a casino resort, but hadn’t eaten much that day. She decided to take a bath before dinner, but didn’t realize how famished and fatigued she was. The kicker of the story is that, once trapped in the tub, she kept herself from becoming dehydrated by using a rubber duck as a cup to drink bathwater.

From what I can tell from the story and from talking to Madsen herself, she had a large extended family who were diligent about keeping in contact with her, though Madsen says they didn’t really have a plan set up.

She usually had daily afternoon phone chats with one daughter, who lives in Ventura County. She met up with family members who live in the area for breakfast on Saturday mornings.
Everyone knew Madsen, who had been a member of the Walnut Creek School board in the 1950s and 1960s, to be healthy and active, going on senior bus trips and regularly meeting up with friends for coffee and volunteering and socializing at one of the local senior centers (pictured above). “I go out a lot at night,” Madsen added.

So, when her Ventura County daughter didn’t reach her by phone for a couple days, the daughter assumed that her busy, active mother out and about. Still, she asked her Walnut Creek sister to pop by mom’s house before the Saturday morning breakfast meet-up. The Walnut Creek sister immediately knew something was wrong when she pulled up to the house and saw her mom’s car and several newspapers in the driveway.

Madsen spent three days in the hospital, recovering from dry skin and the equivalent of bed sores.

“It was a weird dumb stupid thing,” says Madsen, with a laugh. “I will never take another bath as long as I live.”

She adds that the family now has a plan, which is what she advises for every family with an elderly family member who lives on his or her own. In her family plan, she’ll call someone every morning, and if she doesn’t, someone will go check on her.

My 84-year-old mother doesn’t live alone. My husband, son and I live with her. A temporary situation following my husband’s diagnosis and breakdown turned into a permanent one. He and I needed to regroup, and then my father became ill and died in 2003. Meanwhile, my son settled into the neighborhood school, the very one I attended. This is not how I expected life to turn out, living in my childhood home, but I accept it as fate, destiny, whatever. Our post-World War II tract house is small, so it’s not always easy all of us living in one house, but we manage.

And it's probably for the best, mostly for the sake of my son and my mom. I’m not so sure my mom could live on her own. She misses my father , and she’d get lonely, even though she very much likes her alone time in the house. She’s in good health, can cook and clean for herself, and manages her finances. But she has problems with balance and has taken a couple falls. She can also be forgetful, and I’ve come home to find the stove left on. (Okay, I’ve done that once or twice myself.)

Anne, our 91-year-old neighbor, recently died. We all assumed she was in good health; up until a few years ago, she walked herself into downtown Walnut Creek to do her shopping. She also has family in the area, a son who lives in Lafayette, who would regularly stop by and take her out places.

Her death came suddenly. It was during the heat wave following Memorial Day weekend. A neighbor found Anne sitting on her front stoop, looking tired and wan. Anne said she had been suffering from diarrhea. The neighbor took her to the hospital, where she was admitted for severe dehydration. She died a few days later, apparently of a heart attack.

We live in one of Walnut Creek’s older neighborhoods, with a few residents who have lived in their homes a very long time and who now live by themselves, as far as I can tell. I don’t know any of these older women well, but they seem eager to stay independent, and I hope they have family or neighbors close to them who are keeping an eye out.

As Madsen says her family learned, it’s important for families to have a plan. What is yours?

Are Orinda kids (or their parents) circling the wagons in teen’s drinking death?

The mother of Joseph Loudon, the 16-year-old Miramonte sophomore who died, reportedly after drinking too much at a May 23 teen party, is asking for people to come forward and tell what they know.

In a letter to the “Orinda community,” Marianne Payne is asking other kids who were at the party to tell the police what they know or saw. Also, she’s asking for help in locating her son’s I-phone.

Loudon, a popular student and athlete, collapsed at a party given at the home of a neighbor and fellow rugby teammate. Orinda police say that some 50 to 60 young people—including high school students—were at the party where there was reportedly a keg of beer and bottles of hard liquor available. Loudon was taken to Kaiser hospital in Walnut Creek where he was pronounced dead at about midnight.

The parents of Loudon’s 18-year-old neighbor, who hosted the party, were out of town, police say. That 18-year-old, Patrick Gabrielli, also known as P.J., was arrested on charges of contributing to the delinquency of someone under 18 and furnishing an alcoholic beverage to a person under the age of 21 years.

Loudon's mother writes:

“To date, only a handful of these people have been willing to come forward and of this handful of people, most are unwilling to share what they know.

If you were at the party and know what happened please do not be silent. If you are a parent or friend of someone at the party and have information about what happened, please come forward. …

If you have any information at all — please contact the Orinda Police.

We need answers. Answers that I am certain are out there.

The truth about what happened must be known. I have to know — we all need to know so that we can learn from this tragedy so that it will never happen again. Joe had more integrity than anyone I know. He was honest and forthright — and always believed in doing the right thing. Joe deserves this justice.”

Payne’s letter raises questions about whether students at the party have been told by their hyper-protective parents—and possibly their parents’ attorneys—to keep quiet.

Parents in high-achieving communities, like Orinda, take pride in their kids’ stellar grades and SAT scores and ability to gain admission to top colleges.

But more important, these parents should take pride in, and emphasize, that their kids show character, step up, take responsibility, and, as Payne says, help police uncover the truth of what happened.

9 year old Concord girl, with swine flu, dies: How worried should we be?

The news of the May 29 death of Karen Perez, a student at El Monte Elementary School, is of course tragic and troubling. The troubling part comes from the fact that Contra Costa Health officials announced that that a state laboratory test confirmed Wednesday that Karen was infected with swine flu—or H1N1 virus.

However, what's still not known is whether she died of swine flu or something else. She also had a secondary bacterial infection.

Remember the swine flu hysteria of late April, when news of the illness first broke? State and U.S. health officials recommended the 14-day closure of schools, where children came down with suspected or confirmed cases of the illness. Several schools in the East Bay suburbs were closed. Were those closures necessary? Did the media hype fears about this flu and a possible global pandemic?

As it became clear that most cases of the illness were rather mild, health officials relaxed that recommendation, and said school closures were no longer necessary.

"We want to emphasize that there are hundreds of H1N1 cases in the county. The vast majority of these cases have mild or moderate illness, and the patients recover. Tragically, this child did not," said Wendell Brunner, Contra Costa public health director, according to a story in the Contra Costa Times.

The Times also reported:

Karen is the first person in the Bay Area and the first child in the state who died after contracting the virus. Two other Californians with the virus have died; nationwide, at least 20 people with H1N1 have died.

The Concord girl is the seventh person younger than 18 to die from a flu-related illness in California this year. The other deaths were associated with the regular seasonal flu virus.

Many of the swine flu-related deaths reported have involved victims with previous medical conditions. What makes the Concord case unusual, Brunner said, is that Karen was a healthy girl.

Brunner stressed that no schools would be closed and parents should not be concerned. The child was taken out of school more than seven days ago — the flu's incubation period — so no more precautions are necessary at the campus, he said.

According to the latest June 3 update from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention:

The virus is infecting people and is spreading from person-to-person, sparking a growing outbreak of illness in the United States. An increasing number of cases are being reported internationally as well.

It’s thought that H1N1 flu spreads in the same way that regular seasonal influenza viruses spread; mainly through the coughs and sneezes of people who are sick with the virus.

It’s uncertain at this time how severe this novel H1N1 outbreak will be in terms of illness and death compared with other influenza viruses. Because this is a new virus, most people will not have immunity to it, and illness may be more severe and widespread as a result. In addition, currently there is no vaccine to protect against this novel H1N1 virus. CDC anticipates that there will be more cases, more hospitalizations and more deaths associated with this new virus in the coming days and weeks.

New Farmers Market, WC’s annual Art and Wine Festival

In terms of good food and drink it’s going to be a busy weekend in Walnut Creek.

It starts with the official opening Saturday morning of Walnut Creek’s newest farmers market. The Diablo Valley Farmers Market opens 9 a.m. off Ygnacio Valley Road at Mitchell Drive and North Wiget Lane.

With this new market, Walnut Creek will have two each weekend, and three each week between May and October.

The others are the year-round market held in downtown Walnut Creek on north Locust Street every Sunday, until 1 p.m. and the Friday morning market at Rossmoor’s Gateway Clubhouse, 9:30 to 11:30, from May to October.

Then on Saturday, we have the start of the Chamber of Commerce’s 28th annual Art and Wine Festival. This will take place Saturday and Sunday from 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. at Heather Farm Park.

The chamber says the event will feature top-quality music and entertainment on two fully equipped sound stages, thousands of distinctive hand-made crafts and works of art form more than 200 artisans.

But come on. If we go, a fair number of us, sure, will listen to the lovely music and gaze and perhaps even purchase some of the jewelry, pottery, clothing, and textiles on display by skilled artisans.

But, really, we’ll go to taste to wine and beer, and maybe get a little tipsy and feel rather wonderful about the world and life. Anything wrong with that? It's been a rather difficult year, what with the recession and the constant drumbeat of news about cuts to state and local services.

Seeking this bit of sensory escape is, of course, perfectly civilized and perhaps, as some researchers say, healthy. Moreover, high-quality wine and beer makers do think of themselves of artists—of flavor, of the palate, of the whole sensory experience of tasting and sharing these beverages in the company of friends and loved ones.

Anyone who knows me knows I have a fondness for red vino, but they should also know I don’t consider myself a “supertaster,” with any kind of sensitive discernment of the subtleties of flavors and texture.

Actually, for non-supertaster-knuckleheads like me, the Walnut Creek Marriott is hosting the Wine Experience, a “series of educational and interactive wine appreciation seminars, at no cost.” These will be conducted by local wine experts and held both days, in the Lakeside Room at Heather Farm Park throughout Saturday and Sunday.

The festival also features a grape stomp on both Saturday and Sunday from 1 to 1:30 p.m. We should or shouldn't hope it gets as delightfully out of control as that showcased in the famous episode of the 1950s TV comedy I Love Lucy. That episode is pictured above and you can view the YouTube video of it here.

For more information about the Diablo Valley Farmers market at Shadelands, click here.

For more information about the Sunday downtown Walnut Creek Farmers Market on North Locust Street, click here.

For more information about the Walnut Creek Art and Wine Festival, visit the Chamber of Commerce website. The site also has information about tickets and about parking and shuttle transportation to the event.

Finally, here is more detailed information about the wine- and beer-makers that will be participating.

Although wary of STAR testing, I couldn’t help but get a small kick from the API score of my son's WC school

It’s that wicked competitive streak in me.

Patricia Wool, the superintendent for the Walnut Creek School District, e-mailed to parents API scores released last week by the California Department of Education.

And, of course, I noticed that my son’s school scored the highest of all elementaries in the Walnut Creek district on the API tests.

As Wool explains, "the report summarizes the results from spring 2008 STAR testing and becomes the baseline against which to compare the 2009 Growth API which will be released in September. API scores range from 200-1000, and an excellent school's target is 800. I'm pleased to report that Walnut Creek District is doing exceptionally well. "

Here are the results:
Walnut Creek district overall: 903
Buena Vista Elementary: 887
Indian Valley Elementary: 913
Murwood Elementary: 892
Parkmead Elementary: 927
Walnut Heights Elementary: 925
Walnut Creek Intermediate: 900

Okay, so our Walnut Creek district schools are a bit behind some of those famously high-scoring Orinda school district elementaries, according to the Department of Education.

Like Sleepy Hollow, whose kids nabbed a 974, or Del Rey, at 957. And, yeah, we’re lagging a bit behind the Moraga district, which scored a 943 overall, and Lafayette, which, district-wide, scored 914.

Some Mt. Diablo Unified district schools in Walnut Creek and Pleasant Hill also scored over 900: Valle Verde (903); Walnut Acres (924); and Sequoia Elementary (923). Foothill Middle School scored a respectable 889.

As for Walnut Creek high Schools: Northgate earned a respectable 835, and Las Lomas, 844.

But wait! I have raised questions about STAR testing in a previous post. I asked: "What's their point? Do they help kids learn? Do they help schools perform better? Or, are they about $$$--for the schools, who rely on rising scores for federal funding under No Child Left Behind; or for local homeowners and realtors, who count on the top scores of their local public schools to maintain area property values?"

My wariness about STAR and SAT tests might have to do with the fact that I was never that great at standardized tests. Oh, I would do respectably, enough in my day to earn me acceptance to good colleges. But I was nowhere near National Merit level, and, in my petty competitive way, I envied those who were.

I know, I know. I’m presenting mixed messages about my position on these standardized tests, including these STAR tests. Okay, I’m conflicted. I have decried how teachers feel like they have to “teach to the tests,” and that it seems that so much class time is taken up preparing kids, even second graders, on how to fill in those multiple-choice "bubble" sheets. I wonder how much this has to do with real learning.

Then there are those, including my husband, who thinks standardized testing is a good thing—to make sure the schools and teachers are performing adequately. And here I am, writing about the positive API scores for my son’s school and my community's school district.

But I have to ask myself: Does the good test score my son's school received mean it is doing a good job teaching him and other kids? Maybe it does. Then again, maybe it's just a number.

Not to knock my friendly neighborhood realtors, but I’m sure there are some who are happy about these scores.

Letter-writing effort by Save Mt. Diablo to save Mt. Diablo, and why does news of state park closures cut us to the core?

I am not Ms. Nature lover/Outdoorswoman. I don’t much like camping, even though I come from a family of campers, backpackers and one Eagle Scout. I used to like going on good, hearty day hikes, and I keep thinking I should take advantage of our amazing wilderness hiking opportunities in the East Bay. But then, on the weekends, stuff comes up. … a soccer game. … cleaning out the garage. … this blog.

So—given that I haven’t made a state park visit a priority in my life recently—why does Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger’s announcement that he wants to close 80 percent of California’s 280 state beaches, forest areas, and historic parks--including, notably, Mt. Diablo State Park--really hit hard?

More, I’m afraid to admit, than news that the recession and our state’s fiscal crisis means the lay-off of teachers (including one of my son’s former teachers), social workers who investigate child abuse cases, sheriff’s deputies, and deputy district attorneys? These are people all doing valuable work, and work I respect and care about.

Okay, so maybe my priorities are all out of whack, and, yes, I didn’t vote in the May 19 election. So, as some have previousl said, I have no right to complain about the drastic measures the governor and legislators say they need to take.

Sure, fine.

Nonetheless, I don’t think I’m alone in feeling a sense of shock, maybe outrage by this state park closure proposal. I noticed that today’s print version of the San Francisco Chronicle’s Letters to the Editors was devoted to people’s anguish about this proposal.

People have a lot of reasons for their anguish about the parks. A representative with Save Mt. Diablo, a Walnut Creek-based nonprofit dedicated to preservation of the mountain and surrounding open space, says the proposal makes little fiscal sense. The state parks are a major tourist draw for California, he said, and the presence of many parks, including Mt. Diablo State Park, pump more money into the local and state economies than they pull from the state general fund.

But more than money, California’s expanses of nature are essential to its identity and its international allure. Sure, we have movie stars, Silicon Valley, “Beserkley,” and the Mayor of Castro Street. But we’re also known for our Western frontier of rugged mountains, deserts, and endless summer beaches.

For East Bay suburbanites, Mount Diablo is it: the Center of our Universe, geographically, culturally, historically, and (for some) mythologically and spiritually.

I think it’s an intrinsic human need to climb to the top of things—ladders, buildings, towers, and mountains. We need to look down on a view, not just because it’s pretty and even breathtaking—as it is from Mt. Diablo on one of those sparkling clear winter days. But that’s how we get our bearings, our perspective. That’s how we know where we are—in space and n time—and who we are.

What will we lose if we can’t drive, hike, bike, or even run to the top of Mt. Diablo and look down?

Save Mt. Diablo and the State Park Foundation have launched a campaign to send tens of thousands of faxes to Arnold and our legislators. This link will allow you to take 15 seconds to send them a fax, asking them to minimize these cuts. It’s all written out. You just need to fill in your name and contact information and hit “send.”

Some 100 people spoke against closure of state parks and access to other natural resources at an Assembly Budget Conference Committee meeting late Tuesday afternooon, the San Francisco Examiner reported. Those speaking asserted that people will still go on parklands and beaches but the land and people won't be protected by rangers and lifeguards, leading to massive costs from wildfires or litigation if people are hurt. Someone testifying also pointed out that the Governor's proposal to cut $70 million by closing California State Parks, would cost the California economy $46 billion in tourism dollars.

"Bad" Baseball Mom reveals how, like many of us, she struggles to encourage her son while quieting private thoughts of disappointment, despair

I'm honored to post this honest, heartfelt confession from a long-time friend and fellow sports mom. She expresses some difficult feelings that I, too, have wrestled with:

I’m happy to post as a guest blogger for my buddy Crazy, whom I’ve known for years. While she’s Crazy in Suburbia, I’m Crazy on Suburbia’s fringe, as I live on the other side of the tunnel. The foggy side.

I’m going to title this post, “Bad Mommy,” because of a pressing matter. To get to the point, I have a son in Little League. He’s in fifth grade. (Same era as Crazy’s kid.) His team is having one of those roller coaster seasons with lots of ups and downs. Maybe I should say lots of downs and some ups.

Now, I’m a good mom about Little League and competitive sports: meaning I don’t push my son hard; it’s his choice whether to play; I encourage him to have fun, relax, enjoy his team, aim for his personal best, and not worry about the scores.

"It’s only a game," I say. "Win some, lose some; this is life."

But. ... I confess to having a bit of a competitive streak. And while I truly believe all the above, especially when we’re talking about kids’ sports, I’m also vulnerable to emotional ups and downs based on my son’s team’s performance. I feel high when they win; low when they lose. I try hard to hide these feelings from my son, because I know they aren’t helpful. He feels bad enough after a bad game. He certainly doesn’t need to his mom to feel bad, too.

But last night I struggled, teetering on the edge of Bad Momdom. My son’s team got beat really badly in a dragged-out game. They gave up a healthy lead in the last two innings, completely falling apart; their third loss in a row, and this mom felt like crap all evening. It was low-grade crappy feeling, but crappy nonetheless.

I tried super hard not to let it show. I said lots of upbeat things about “bad luck” and the “damned heat.” I remarked on his good plays. Lots of versions of “tomorrow’s another day.”

Yet, inside, I still feel, well, disappointed. Bummed. I was even embarrassed when a couple of neighbors asked later how the game had gone. Try as I might, I’m sure my son picked up on this. I was a little testy all night. Bad mommy.

Do any of you know this place?

I sincerely believe that us parents, we really need to get over it, and not hinge our emotions on the sports wins and losses of our kids. All this does is pressure them to perform for us—on top of all they’re learning about their game and team play.

I know there are really Bad Moms and Dads out there who get so emotionally invested in their kids’ sports that they start fistfights at games, or worse. Spit on refs. Throw tantrums. I read these stories with horror, and pity their kids. But hey, I woke this morning feeling guilty about my own self-indulgence last night; vowing to adjust my attitude for the rest of the season. I hope I can.