So we have Mean Girls, but what about Mean Moms?

Yes, apparently it's true. The catty, sneaky, back-stabbing style of "girl world" fighting that's prevalent in films like Mean Girls and Heathers starts much younger than high school or even middle school. It starts young -- preschool young.

I recently published this story in the Contra Costa Times, which has experts proposing that "relational aggression" -- as opposed to the punching, shoving and physical aggression among boys -- is a daily reality for some girls, including some as young as 3 to 5.

In gathering real people's stories, I heard from a number of parents, some from here in Walnut Creek, about their daughters' experiences with mean girls at school.

But there is one fascinating sub-plot that I didn't have space to explore. It's apparently a related phenomenon: the prevalence of Mean Moms.

Several people told me about Mean Moms at their kids' elementary, middle and high schools. I recently and inadvertently ran into one of these High School Mean Moms myself. And, these parents said, these Mean Moms very likely role model the clique-ish, exclusionary, bratty behavior exhibited by their kids, from preschool to high school.

As it happens, Mean Moms is the subject of a new film in development starring Jennifer Aniston. It's about a happily married mother of two who moves from a small town to affluent suburbs and runs into the world of "competitive parenting." The story comes form the book Queen Been Moms and Kingpin Dads, penned by Rosalind Wiseman. It's something of a sequel to her book Queen Bees and Wannabees, which was adapted into Tina Fey's hit 2004 film comedy Mean Girls. (And despite what this poster shows, Sandra Bullock and Cameron Diaz are not involved in the project.)

Not long ago, Mean Mom behavior was rampant at one Walnut Creek elementary school, a source I'll call Anna, told me. It reflected the extent to which Mean Girl behavior had become a huge issue at the school, so much so that, according to Anna: "the principal had all the girls by the time they were in fifth grade meeting the counselor once a month."

Anna added: "I recall (the principal) saying several times how uniquely 'mean' our girls were to each other."

Unfortunately, the principal couldn't mandate meetings for these girls' mothers. Anna definitely saw a link to the behavior of certain girls and their mothers: "One of the things that struck me about this school during the time was that the moms themselves were very cliquey and seemed to encourage this behavior with their girls."

According to Anna, there were the two moms in particular, whom I'll call "Kris" and "Bethany." They became friends while their daughters were in kindergarten. When a third girl wanted to schedule a playdate with Kris's daughter, Kim, Kris said no, that Kim didn't need friends other than "Bryn," Bethany's precious little girl.

For most of elementary school, Kim and Bryn would sometimes allow other girls into their circle but would exclude many others. But by fifth grade, Kim and Bryn were no longer friends, which left Kim herself vulnerable to bullying. Some of us might think, good, Kim's getting a dose of her own poison, but bullying is bullying and it's never right.

Anna also told me about the case of Girl Scout Mom, who was also active in the PTA. I guess she was a Queen Bee/Regina George type with a more outwardly altruistic, public service bent. (Regina George is the teen Queen Bee character played by Rachel McAdams in the film Mean Girls.) Cynical me has seen plenty of socially aggressive types who often try to attain power and influence anyway they can, and they often do it by veiling their power-hungry impulses with "good works."

Anyway, Girl Scout Mom liked to get together with other moms she favored and dish about some of the little girls in the class. In a divide-and-conquer move that psychologists and child development researchers say is popular among socially aggressive females, Girl Scout Mom split the troop in two and tried to prevent little girls she didn't like from joining her trop.

It's no surprise, Anna says, that Girl Scout Mom's daughter was a pretty mean specimen during elementary and middle school and is still at it in high school.

Speaking of high school, while I was working on this story, I was alerted to some Mean Mom stuff and parent cliquishness stuff going on at my son's high school.

It was startling to hear. For one thing, I graduated from high school some years ago (more years than I'll recount here), and had come to think, naively so, that all this popularity and cliquishness crap around a high school community was something that the kids may have to put up with. But supposedly, you would think, that the parents -- people my age -- have grown out of this.

But I learned that's not entirely case: there are a few parents who seem to be totally caught up in the clique-y-ness going on at their kids' high school. They have their social groups that may have formed way back in their neighborhoods or around swim clubs or traveling soccer teams. They continue to bond over their kids' activities. They might sit together at football games or other events or head leadership committees for fundraisers or other school events. It may be a case of parents wanting to do their best to ensure a healthy, happy educational experience for their sons and daughters. Or, it's another version of parents trying to live out their hopes and dreams through their kids.

I'm not part of the Popular Parent Crowd, if there is such a thing. I'd say that most of the  parents who seem to be part of this group come across as nice and genuinely interested in doing good things for the school, the kids and the community. Without them and the work they do, the school probably wouldn't have money to fund school sports, and the students wouldn't have help putting on their proms and senior all-nighters.

Then again, I was talking to one high school mother I'll call Jane who moved to this area a couple years ago when her son was a freshman. She had been a long-time school volunteer back in the Midwest and had plenty of professional fund-raising, event-programming experience. At back-to-school meetings and the like, she was exhorted to get involved, volunteer, put in time.

She put her name on various sign up sheets, but never heard back.

Certainly, she received emails asking her to sign up to bring dishes to sports group gatherings or to donate a few hours to set up for proms or other events. But she never heard from anyone who was interested in mining any of her knowledge or expertise on planning events or building community good will.

In some ways, the indifferent shoulder this mother received reminds me of something I heard at a national conference for dad bloggers a couple months ago. A male Facebook executive said he was routinely shut out of opportunities for leadership roles in volunteering at his kids' private San Francisco school because he was a working dad -- and not part of a long-term moms' school volunteer coterie.

He said dads were mostly called on to bring their tool kits and build stuff -- sets for plays or snack shacks for football games.

His story reminded me of Jane's story. She was left to wonder if she was being sidelined for certain types of school involvement because she and her family were new to the area, which meant her kids hadn't grown up in certain neighborhoods, attending certain schools, or, in the case of Walnut Creek, devoting their summers at certain community swim clubs.

At around the same time, my Mean Mom encounter occurred, ironically or not, when I was reporting on the Mean Moms story.

One night, this woman, whom I never met, lit into me via social media, accusing me of "ranting" about a certain topic of local interest. Yes, I have been known to rant. I'm an occasional blogger, after all, and ranting is what we bloggers sometimes do. I admit I picked the wrong context in this case. That's my bad. Anyway, this mother told me I was being ridiculous, and maybe I was. But then, she said took things too far, by saying disparaging things about my "kids" (I only have one) and me professionally.

What was curious is that over the next few days, I was contacted by other parents who saw her posts and were disturbed by her comments. "I have no desire to know her," one friend wrote.

Another friend, who's pretty enmeshed in the school/parent/volunteer community, warned me I should probably watch my back, because apparently this woman is effectively Popular High School Mom. She's super-involved, and in the Popular Parent Crowd. She may be like Girl Scout Mom in that she veils certain power-hungry impulses in good works, hosting events or donating to education funding efforts -- and getting her name prominently listed in foundation newsletters. So, her "good works" and Popular Mom status give her the power, according to this friend, to decide if certain parents will be included or shut out of certain volunteer committees.

I have no idea if any of these claims about Popular High School Mom are true, but it was amazing  to learn that there was a parent in the school who had gained this kind of Mean Girl/Mean Mom  reputation. I thought, really?

It's still curious, weird and disturbing that this kind of stuff goes on. I mostly feel bad for the parents of younger kids -- the ones I wrote about in my Times article -- who are still trying to walk their kids and themselves through the treacherous path of Mean Girls and and general bullying -- as I'm learning  -- the Mean Moms who raise these kids.

Walnut Creek's Century movie theater the latest cineplex to serve wine, beer

So along with buying popcorn and nachos with that neon orang-y cheese, patrons at the Century Walnut Creek 14 will soon also be able to buy a glass of wine or beer. This is according to a "Public Notice of Application to Sell Alcoholic Beverages," posted in one of the windows of the movie theater facing Locust Street.

The application is made to the state Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control, and says the license is for a "new wine/beer eating place.

What exactly does this mean? When one in your party gets her Icee, does this mean you can also belly up the concession stand for a glass of Cabernet Sauvignon or craft beer? And then take your drinks and overpriced and over-salted junior popcorn into the theater to watch the show? Or will the theater create a special bar area to serve alcoholic drinks, along with more upscale food.

The movie/wine/beer trifecta has been going on at a few other theaters in the area.

 Cinemark Holdings, Inc., which also owns Walnut Creek's Century theater, opened a new 12-screen high-technology movie theater in Napa in 2012. The theater, in the "heart of the wine country," also features the CineVino Wine Bar with a luxury lounge serving small plate selections, along with wine from Trinchero Family Estates and Francis Ford Coppola Wineries and  beer from Lagunitas Brewing Company, the North Bay Business Journal reported. 

Cinemark, which is based in Plano, Texas, has opened wine bars in other new theaters in communities in Colorado and Texas.

More locally again, Livermore's independent Vine Cinema and Alehouse, features first-run and independent and classic films (bravo!) for its entertainment lineup. Its alehouse menu serves burgers, caesar salad, pizza and salad along with a wide selection of draft beer and premium wines, including some from Livermore Valley -- for the reasonable price of $5.76 to $6.25.

I'm not sure, but the Sundance Kabuki theater in San Francisco's Japantown may have introduced the upscale eatery and wine bar concept to the Bay Area theater-going experience.  One of the hosts of the international San Francisco Film Festival, the complex reopened in 2007 after undergoing a $6 million renovation by Robert Redford's Sundance Cinemas.  One enhancement is the balcony bar, where, says the San Francisco Chronicle, you could eat ceviche and tartare and sip a cocktail at your reserved seat in the balcony while watching a film.

PG&E and the Monterey pine that crashed into my back yard

One neighbor described the sound as a big “whoosh.” To me, just rousing myself from sleep at 2:30 a.m., it sounded like something crashing – a ladder against an outside wall or a bookshelf in my son’s room slamming to the floor. 

It was July 3, and the disaster – whatever it was – woke all of us up. Lights blinked on in various rooms of the house, and my husband, mother and I in our nightgowns and sweatpants rushed to check the house, inside and then out. We couldn’t see anything right away, after going through the different rooms and then walking outside the front and back doors.  We even looked over the fence into a neighbor’s back yard, and saw no sign of disaster.

But then I ventured further out onto our back patio. It is set against the side of a hill that slopes up behind our house. The light from our dining room shone on the patio, and I could see something unusual: a branch with pine needles lay on the ground, and nearby rested a greenish pine cone. Neither are among the the scattering of oak leaves or twigs that usually wind up on our backyard patio.  

I looked up the hill, into the dark, above a trellis my father long ago built over the patio.

And there it was, in the blue-black light, the outline of some giant hulking thing. My mind flashed to image of a ship run aground onto a beach into a storm, or the bones of some prehistoric behemoth.

I couldn't make it up the hill via an established walkway. It was blocked by the tree and its aftermath.  I moved around to the other side of the yard and made it to the top part of the back yard. Much of the top part of our back yard, where a redwood tree and apricot tree stood, was now a tangle of branches and needles.

A street runs behind our backyard. I walked a ways down it and saw that the downed tree was maybe at least 40 feet long and that its source was at the far end of our next-door neighbor’s yard near the street. The tree had broken off at the roots.

Several hours later, after the sun had come up, we joined some neighbors in waking to this strange situation. As it was, my vacation was starting that morning, a break that included a road trip to the Sierras for a wedding and then to Oregon. 

Fortunately, we immediately discerned that the tree toppling had caused no damage that required any immediate attention.

The tree was a Monterey pine, and it had crashed across our fence and probably destroyed the two other trees, though it was hard to see amid all the tangle of branches. It may have also caused a crack in our trellis. But no utilities were threatened, and our house was spared. We called to file a claim with the insurance company, and talked to neighbors, notably those next door who owned the tree. 

So has begun an interesting journey of trying to figure out who is responsible for the damage to our property and perhaps the even bigger cost of chopping down and removing the tree.

Our next-door neighbors feel terrible, and they are good people and good neighbors. They are an older couple, and have been very kind to our family and other neighbors over the years. 

They said they had been worried about the tree since the spring. That’s when PGE dispatched a company to come out and prune the tree’s branches which had been touching a power line. Apparently, those branches had caught fire sometime in the winter.

But our neighbors said the tree company hired by PGE had pruned the branches in a way that made the tree look dangerously unbalanced. 

Somehow, over the months, we missed all this. Then again, this particular tree, somewhat distant from our properly line, had never been directly visible from our back yard. There were other trees standing in the way. It never seemed to loom threateningly above us or our house.

But in getting out and talking to neighbors who live on the street above us, I learned that they, too, had been worried about the tree since PGE's tree-trimming work. And, they, too, thought the tree was leaning pretty precariously. One told me she worried the tree would crash into our next-door neighbors’ house or into ours' in any storms this coming winter.

According to PGE's website, its Vegetation Management Department is required by state law to maintain clearances around high-voltage power lines. It dispatches companies to do the pruning work. These contracted companies are described as “qualified” foresters who determine the amount and type of pruning based on, the website says: the tree’s growth and structure, wind sway, species of tree and environmental factors, among other things.

“As always, we also include a reasonable margin of safety above the absolute-minimum clearance requirements,” the website says.

When we got back from vacation, I called PGE,  and talked to one representative who listened, took the information and said she would send out a claim form.  A few days later, I received a call from another PGE representative – unfortunately I wasn’t able to hear or write down the department name. This person  sounded a bit confused about why I had called.  After I explained the situation, she huffed impatiently and suggested that PGE was in no way responsible; our neighbors are responsible because the tree was on their property….

I said I still wanted to file a claim and to obtain records of any work that had been done on the tree.  She said little else, other than that there would be a phone record of our call. 

I suppose that is reassuring -- the paper trail has been established! -- but the more I read about PGE's responsibilities around tree-pruning programs, the more I think pushing them for answers is worth my time. Two weeks since the tree toppling, I've also become worried that the tree could become a fire hazard, as its heap of branches and needles dry out in the hot summer weather. Shouldn't PGE be concerned in that regard?  

Meanwhile, I’ve heard from our homeowners' insurance company that it may only pay to repair the damage to the fence and to the trellis; but it won’t pay to remove the tree and all its branches. A tree removal company has given us an estimate of $3,300 to do that job. 

In the meantime, our community could also be dealing with an epidemic of toppling Monterey pines. The Contra Costa Times said last Wednesday a Monterey pine, across the street from Kaiser Permanente's medical campus in Walnut Creek, toppled over and landed on three cars. 

Suicides in Public Places Traumatic to Witnesses

After Eric Hall, his father and two teenage sons rescued a high school girl who had jumped from the Golden Gate Bridge, they continued on their sailboat ride around San Francisco Bay but in a stunned silence, punctuated by brief conversations about the girl, how she was doing and the possible reasons for her jump.


"She's the same age as my boys," Eric Hall of Walnut Creek told me in an interview in April 2011. "We were just trying to get our heads around it."

I recount this conversation as I wondered about the people who may have witnessed a young Concord woman take her own life by intentionally jumping from the third-floor patio at Nordstrom Thursday afternoon.
Walnut Creek police say the woman, identified as Jessica Almaraz, 29, was by herself when she jumped just before 2 p.m. Thursday. She landed near the sidewalk of South Broadway and Mt. Diablo Boulevard, police said. Almaraz was pronounced dead at the scene.

Were those who may have witnessed this young woman's death traumatized in similar ways to Eric Hall and his family? It's possible. In The Final Leap, his book about Golden Gate Bridge suicides, John Bateson, the former executive director of the Contra Costa Crisis Center, describes the emotional impact on the classmates of the boy who jumped from the bridge but survived. 

The class was visiting the bridge on a school field trip when the boy jumped. "While the jumper was being treated for broken bones, many of his classmates were in shock and needing mental health services. Undoubtedly, it will be a long time before they forget the horror they witnessed," Bateson wrote. 

To suddenly watch someone try to take their own life can lead to degrees of emotional fall-out, ranging from bad dreams, to sleep problems, to depression that causes you to become isolated or to shut down emotionally. You might also be plagued by flashbacks of the event. This is according to Catherine Greenleaf, author of the book, Healing the Hurt Spirit: Daily Affirmations for People Who Have Lost a Loved One to Suicide. On her blog, Healing from Suicide Grief, she writes: 


There are, unfortunately, instances in which a person dies by suicide in a public arena. If you have witnessed the suicide of a stranger in a public place, what should you do? Should you just continue on as you were before and brush the incident off? After all, you never met the person in question and don't even know the person's name. 

There is the time-worn adage, "a witness to violence is a victim of violence." Suicide is a form of self-inflicted violence and witnessing a suicide, whether you know the person or not, can be extremely traumatic.


She advises witnesses who are experiencing any of the above symptoms to seek help from a therapist who specializes in bereavement. 


Meanwhile, if you or someone you know is struggling with feelings of depression or suicidal thoughts the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline offers free, round-the-clock support, information and resources for help. The number is 800-273-8255. 

The lethal mix of aggrieved masculine pride, suicide and easy access to guns in Columbine, Virginia Tech and other mass shootings -- Newton, too?

Ever since details emerged about how Adam Lanza massacred 20 first graders with a military-style rifle at a Connecticut elementary, I’ve been thinking back to that group of gun-toting Bay Area Open Carry members who came to Walnut Creek in 2010.

Remember them?

They came to a restaurant in Plaza Escuela. As you can see in this photo at left, they wore their weapons—unloaded—and ammo strapped to their belts, to demonstrate their right at the time to openly wear handguns in public. (They’ve since lost that right under a state law that went into effect earlier this year.)

Some proudly and defiantly displayed their semiautomatics, including Glocks, which have become known as the weapon of choice for mass shooters in recent years, including the assault on U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords in Arizona last year, the Aurora, Colo. movie theater rampage and now the massacre of students and educators at Sandy Hook Elementary. 

While Adam Lanza killed his young victims with a Bushmaster .223-caliber rifle, loaded with ammunition "designed for maximum damage," he also carried Glock and Sig Sauer handguns that his gun enthusiast mother, and first murder victim, legally purchased. 

I remember the Open Carry guys being friendly. Their talk about being responsible, law-abiding citizens sounded convincing. But their rhetoric revealed a mindset I tend to hear when I listen to the hysterical commentators on Fox news and conservative talk radio.

They sounded aggrieved, defensive, maybe a bit paranoid, and in possession of a sense of entitlement about their gun rights. "It's time for citizens to arm up," said Gus, a 50-year-old guy from Antioch said. Gus, who had introduced his two kids, starting at age 8, to firing guns, said it was especially important for citizens to arm up because of all the murder, raping, maiming and other mayhem that is occurring in our communities.

Again, he was speaking to me in downtown Walnut Creek. At the time I didn't recall lots of murder, raping, maiming and other mayhem happening recently. I don't think brawls breaking out in downtown bars -- as dismaying as they can be -- reached that level of civil unrest. Antioch may be a tougher town than Walnut Creek, but even it does not fit the image he summoned of armed and dangerous streets and roving bands of criminals. Maybe that image fits the worst parts of Oakland, or Richmond – or Los Angeles, during the Rodney King riots. Actually, it sounds closer to the landscape of post-apocalyptic horror fantasies. Yeah, I could see that possessing a stockpile of weapons would come in handy for a Walking Dead-style zombie invasion.

I don’t mean to make light of any discussion about firearms in the wake of the Sandy Hook rampage. But it’s hard not to be mystified when some gun proponents talk about the need to arm schoolteachers or how any new gun control laws would hinder their ability to protect themselves and their families.

Suburbanites—especially white suburbanites—who constantly express fears about being victims of violent crime seriously need to get over themselves. I’ve felt this way ever since covering crime in Richmond nearly 20 years ago. Now, there’s a place where people have good reason to fear being robbed, beaten or shot, notably if they are young men of color and they live in certain neighborhoods. 

Some brave gun owners are speaking up publicly in the wake of the Sandy Hook rampage and have dismissed the idea that anyone needs a Bushmaster or a Glock or any other semiautomatic to hunt or to protect themselves and their homes.  The main reason  anyone wants to own a Glock or a Bushmaster--weapons once mostly limited to armed forces personnel and law enforcement--is because they are fun to shoot, these gun owners say. 

 “I am a gun owner. I am an avid hunter. I have a weapon in my home for protection. I support — for the most part — the Second Amendment," writes John P. Lopez, a Texas radio show host. “But never has it been more clear that the United States should ban and buy back semiautomatic weapons. They kill. They kill children. That is their sole purpose — to kill.”

Lopez says that he has many friends who will argue that semiautomatics are their hobby and passion, and they like to shoot the guns in remote locations. “I hope they enjoy shooting these weapons at trees. Because having that right also gives disturbed individuals the right to kill children”

This love for the culture of guns and for shooting big powerful weapons, embraced by some of the Open Carry guys I met in Walnut Creek in 2010, fed into the thinking of the perpetrators of murder-suicides at three U.S. schools since 1999, according to a 2010 study “Suicide by Mass murder: Masculinity, Aggrieved Entitlement, and Rampage School Shootings.”

The study’s authors, Rachel Kalis and Michael Kimmel, with the Department of Sociology and SUNY Stony Brook, examined three mass shootings that ended with the perpetrators killing themselves as law enforcement moved in: the 1999 Columbine High School shooting that left 12 dead and 21 wounded; the Virginia Tech shooting that killed 32 and wounded 17; and the 2008 rampage at Northern Illinois University that killed six and wounded.

The shooters in the three tragedies share several characteristics, according to Kalis and Kimmel,who is one of the world's leading researchers on men and masculinity. With Stonybrook's Center for the Study of Men and Masculinities, he was awarded a John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation grant. 

“All the perpetrators were males, all were students in the rural or suburban schools they terrorized, and all evinced a self-justifying sense of righteousness to their actions,” the authors write. “Feeling aggrieved, wronged by the world – these are typical adolescent feelings, common to many boys and girls. What transforms the aggrieved into mass murders is also a sense of entitlement, a sense of using violence against others, making others hurt as you, yourself, might hurt.”

Connecticut police are still sorting through the remainders of Adam Lanza’s life, interviewing people who knew him and his family, to try to figure out what he was thinking in the days and months leading up to his mass murder and suicide. Was there something going on in his world or in his head that told him he had to kill other people, then end his own life? There are reports that his mother talked about wanting him to get out of the house more, or that she planned to move the two of them to Washington state. 

In any case, his actions show someone who wanted to make a point with his death, by targeting a school filled with young children. Connecticut authorities say he went to Sandy Hook elementary with enough ammunition to kill everyone in the entire school.

Not only are school shootings done to get a point across, access to high-powered weapons was crucial to carrying out their plans.

“These young men were all socialized to see violence as a way to prove their manhood,” Kalish and Kimmel write. “Additionally, they were socialized in an environment that provided access to firearms.”

We know that Adam Lanza was definitely socialized in this environment. His mother helped teach him how to shoot, and he lived in a community populated by gun owners, hunters and assault weapons enthusiasts. The rural, hilly areas outside Newton was home to scores of shooting ranges, including some operating under the radar.  The sound of gunfire, exploding at all hours, had become a common sound in otherwise bucolic Newton, according to the New York Times. 

Contrary to what some gun proponents argue, it’s not likely that Harris, Klebold, Cho, Kazmierczak, or even Lanza would have planned suicides that involved killing other people had they not been able to arm themselves with guns:

“The access to guns proved a crucial element of their trajectories, since without such availability, it is unlikely that these young men would have made the same decisions,” Kalish and Kimmel write. “They may have wanted to end their lives, but without access to guns, their suicides would likely not have been preceded by mass murder.”

The Swallows of--no, not of San Juan Capistrano--of Walnut Creek

As I pulled into Trader Joe's on South California Boulevard mid-day Saturday, I thought I might be walking into a scene of Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds. The air space directly above the parking lot was filled with the flapping wings of possibly 100 or more birds. And after I parked and started to walk toward the store, I caught what looked like bird after bird perched on a north-facing ledge beneath the store's roof.

An older man had a camera trained up the side of the wall. He was taking photos of what might be something of a miracle in Walnut Creek. Forget the miracle of the Mission at San Juan Capistrano to the south--which has seen a diminishing of the flocks that nest there around St. Joseph's Day in March, according to an article in San Juan Capistrano Patch.

Apparently, Trader Joe's in Walnut Creek is where the swallows want to be.

(Hmm, then again the appearance of this huge flock of birds might be some sign that

the world was indeed going to end this weekend, as an Oakland-based minister publicly proclaimed--with media people like me being silly and giving him his 15 Minutes.)

Anyway,, I approached the north wall of Trader Joe's, the ledge containing the birds, and the man taking their photos.

And, I quickly saw that the birds were not perching there. From one end to the other, that ledge had become the home to at least 50 mud nests. The birds were setting up a place to lay eggs and nurture some chicks. Some bird couples were still in the process of building their nests.

The man taking photos turned out to be, in his own way, like the Bird Lady in The Birds. If you've never seen this movie, she's the older woman in the tweed suit who is the big bird expert. She suddenly appears in the Bodega Bay restaurant, telling Tippi Hedren and Rod Taylor that their fears about the birds of this coastal town suddenly acting wacky, banding together and turning on humankind, have no scientific basis. Her defense of the birds comes before the birds attack the school house and blow up the gas station.

As I approached the Bird Man, I heard the Trader Joe's swallows give off a lovely and non-threatening chorus of "'cheep cheep"--not like the caw-caw-caw and screech of The Birds gangs of gulls and crows. The Bird Man informed me that they were swallows.

The Bird Man--no, not like the Alcatraz Bird Man--sounded like he knew what he was talking about. He lives in Walnut Creek and is friendly with the folks at East Bay Nature, the shop in the San Miguel Center on Newell Avenue that specializes in everything for feeding birds.

Anyway, he gave me his non-Rapture, non-Hitchcock-thriller explanation for the swallows deciding that Trader Joe's was the place for their flock to build their nests.

Trader Joe's and its parking lot is next door to Las Trampas Creek. The swallows need the mud from the creek bed to build their nests, he explained. The creek also has its habitat for insects, which the birds feed on.

So, with the Bird Man, I stood there in rapture, watching this amazing miracle of nature. The birds fluttered back and forth between the creek, diving down to bite up mud in their beaks and bringing it back to add to their honeycombed-shaped nests at the top of the wall.

We'll have to see what happens--whether the world will end, or these birds will suddenly start swooping down and pecking at shoppers' scalps.

Of course, Trader Joe's management could get fed up with the white drips of bird poop that you could see starting to stream down their wall.

Barring some health issue with the flock's presence on the wall of this grocery store, I just hope the birds get to stay, create their little families, as well as something beautiful for us all to stop and see.

Some news about me--and Walnut Creek

You will soon be able to get even more news about Walnut Creek.

I have a new job, editing a new website, WalnutCreekPatch (WalnutCreek.Patch.com), devoted exclusively to news about this wonderful, intriguing, sometimes infuriating town that I, and many of you, call home.

This new job offers exciting possibilities for me. But, ultimately for you, fellow Walnut Creek’ans.

For the past 20 months, I’ve been covering Walnut Creek on this blog, Crazy in Suburbia. As AKA Soccer Mom, I’ve been doing this on a pro bono, nights-and-weekend basis.  I’ve had the time of my life doing this blog, more fun than I can possibly imagine.

I’ve also learned a hell of a lot—mostly from you readers. I started this blog for my own self-indulgence, but I quickly realized that I could, maybe, provide a service to people who live and work in Walnut Creek. I didn’t know where I was taking this blog. I can say that I came to appreciate how much I live in a community of smart, talented, diverse and engaged people who, like me, were eager for ways to find out what’s really going on here, and to connect with other people in town. And to grumble sometimes, debate, learn and celebrate.

Now, covering Walnut Creek will be my job.  I’ll be able to devote myself full time to reporting on what’s going on here—the good, the controversial, the surprising, the extraordinary. I’ll also be working with reporters, photographers, videographers and people from the community to help this site tell stories--in words, pictures and video--,about Walnut Creek.

Who is forward-thinking enough—or Crazy enough—to allow me to do this? 

Patch is an effort by the new and improved Aol (formerly AOL) to provide communities with local news. There are already Patch sites on the East Coast, in Southern California and right here in Danville, San Ramon, and Pleasanton. 

I can’t tell you how excited I am. One reason is that Walnut Creek is my hometown. 

This is a photo of me, a few days old in Kaiser hospital, right here in Walnut Creek. The date shows that I had been in the hospital for several days. Yes, I was born back in the Old Times—when babies and their mothers were not sent home after 24 hours.  This was also back in the day when women like my mother were rendered unconscious to give birth, and then allowed to stay in the hospital for several days to recuperate from the meds.

Not to extend the birth metaphor too much, but I liken the process of launching this new website, WalnutCreekPatch, to giving birth to my son 12 years ago. By the way, he’s a student in Walnut Creek public schools.

There’s the long, lovely gestation of nurturing Crazy in Suburbia. Now, the contractions are starting, getting things ready for the launch of WalnutCreekPatch. I’m going without an epidural, and I'll hit the ground running on launch day. 

When is launch day?  Soon. If all goes well, by the end of this week. One more birth metaphor: We’re getting near the transition.

Ouch!

A couple more things you should know.

WalnutCreekPatch.com will ultimately be your site. One of the most rewarding things about Crazy in Suburbia has been stepping back from my own opinions and agenda and letting you suggest coverage, contribute, instruct, share, comment. As I said, I’ve learned a lot from all of you. I’m not perfect. I don’t know everything.  I’m always learning. I always want to do better. 

That’s a philosophy—which I picked up from one of my favorite yoga teachers—that I’ll be taking to WalnutCreekPatch.

At WalnutCreekPatch, you’ll be able to upload photos and videos of your own, about things that matter to you. You’ll be able to contribute restaurant reviews and comment on stories. And you’ll always be able to contact me with ideas and tips.

And Crazy in Suburbia? The blog will stay where it is for the time being. But, I’ll be posting Walnut Creek news items on Walnut CreekPatch, and I’ll be posting Walnut Creek-related Soccer Mom/Crazy in Suburbia comments on the new site.

You can continue to reach me at crazyinsuburbia@gmail.com, but you can also reach me at Martha@patch.com. That’s right, I’m Martha.

You can also follow WalnutCreekPatch on Facebook and on Twitter.

And, here’s a shout out to some people who helped me out in the beginning and kept coming back to be part of this crazy community

The Mayor of Claycord,  Mister Writer, Bill Gram-Reefer, the Lemony Lady, Radar, EastBayDaze, JoJo Potato, Thud, Obiwan, Beau Hunk, LeftCoast, DumbAsBricks, Lorrielovesparties, Masterlock, Jojo Potato, Huston Meadows, W.C. Varones, Edi Birsan, Up3rd, Jason Wheeler, Elizabeth, Daffodil Hugger, David, CreekyDiva, and 20^thcentury mom.  And all you Anonymouses. 

Tim Hogan suffered medical emergency prior to deadly car crash into Walnut Creek

"He kind of yelled out and flailed his arms, and he passed out," recalls Janet Hogan. The 74-year-old Walnut Creek woman is the mother of TIm Hogan and the lone survivor of the April 11 crash that killed Tim, 40, of San Diego, and his father, Janet's 79-year-old husband, James Hogan.

Janet Hogan was telling her story Thursday to reporters at a Concord fire station. She has recovered physically from the ordeal of being swept several miles downstream, and of almost drowning. And while she's devastated at the loss of her husband of 43 years and one of her two sons, she said she was grateful to be alive.  

She said that stormy Sunday evening, she, her husband and son were on their way to dinner in downtown Walnut Creek, heading north on San Miguel Road towards Mt. Diablo Boulevard.  Tim was driving his parents' Honda Accord. Police say the crash occurred at 6:15 p.m. around the time a downpour of rain was soaking the city.

After Tim Hogan passed out, Janet says she tried to pull her son's foot off the accelerator while her husband grabbed for the steering wheel.

But it was too late. The car crashed through the fence where Mt. Diablo Boulevard crosses the creek, just across the street from the downtown Safeway. The car turned over and landed upside down in the water.

Janet Hogan, an experienced swimmer, did what she had to do. She could see that her husband was bleeding from the head. She grabbed him, and pulled him out of the car. He was immediately swept away with the current. Minutes later, he was seen floating upside down in the water. She tried to grab her son, but he was strapped into the car, with his seatbelt still on.

The strong current of the 50-degree water started to pull her downstream, too, and she knew she could not help her son.

The water carried her several miles north.  For about two miles, she managed to keep her head above water and call to some kids along the waterway to call 911.  She could see fire rescue personnel throw ropes to her.  "The first one I missed, the second one I missed." She heard a rescue helicopter and saw police officers on the bridges: "I knew help was on the way."

Her saviour came near Bancroft Road and Treat Boulevard in the form of a Contra Costa County Fire District engineer, Dave Manzeck, who was dangling from a California Highway Patrol helicopter. In a dramatic rescue, he pulled her from the water, after she was started to go under.

"He's my saviour for ever more," says Janet Hogan about Manzeck.

Tim Hogan was found strapped in the car later that evening and pronounced dead. The exact nature of his medical emergency is pending.

James Hogan disappeared in the cold, choppy current; his body was found three days later near Buchanan Field in Concord.

Said Janet Hogan to reporters: "The only reason I'm sitting here talking to all of you today is with the grace of God and all the help that I've gotten from the Fire Department, police, the helicopter, CHP, Walnut Creek police and probably a lot more that I can't even name right now." 

With the exception of Rossmoor, Walnut Creek is slacking off on the Census

I filled out our family’s U.S. Census form and mailed it back. What a good citizen I am. I guess.

I happen to be a census geek, digging around different data tables, trying different queries. The census is a  goldmine for data about the United States and local communities. It provides a picture of who we are, where we come from, and how we live. 

Cities are particularly keen on making sure the census gets accurate numbers of the people who live within their borders. There are big bucks at stake, which are especially crucial for geographic areas in these tough economic times.

“When you fill out your 2010 census form, you help determine how more than $400 billion a year is distributed to communities," the census website says. On Walnut Creek’s website it reads: “Census participation is important, especially in today's tight economic environment, because per-capita federal funding is tied to census count. Our community stands to lose about $11,450 in federal funding for each person who goes uncounted.” 

So far, on National Census Day, Walnut Creek’s participation stands at only 59 percent. We might have our very civic-minded residents of Rossmoor to thank for scoring just a bit better than the 52-percent national participation rate. According to the Contra Costa Times, more than 75 percent of households in the Walnut Creek retirement community already have mailed back their 2010 census forms, the highest rate of any Bay Area neighborhood.

The city as a whole is doing a bit better than those bigger slackers in San Ramon (52 percent); Danville (57 percent); Pleasant Hill (55 percent); Martinez (57 percent); and Concord (51 percent). But we’re not keeping up with those Lamorinda overachievers: Lafayette, 61 percent; Orinda, 61 percent; and Moraga, 63 percent. You can view this map to see how communities are doing. 

Those Lamorinda numbers are up there with the top five states in census participation rates: the Dakotas, North and South; Wisconsin, Nebraska, and Iowa. (To be snarky, one might say that there’s not a lot else to do in some parts of those states than to fill out a Census form. )You can view maps showing regions and communities and their participation rates at the U.S. Census website.

Starting in May, federal census workers will start walking the streets, visiting the homes of those who have not completed their forms.

If you didn’t receive a Census form in the mail, and want to avoid that visit and participate in this once-in-a-decade count, you can pick up forms in the City Hall lobby, 1666 North Main Street.  

  

What do you think Walnut Creek's "brand" should be?

Seriously.

OK, I know we could all have fun with this, and I could get snarky.  But I'm reading comments on my  earlier post about Roger Brooks, the consultant who was hired by the Downtown Business Association to come up with a brand and logo to help promote Walnut Creek. Some of you were not wild about Brooks' ideas or the need to hire someone like him. And I'm thinking maybe we could do better than this self-described "destination guru " (thanks, by the way to the reader, who provided this link).

If you'll recall, Brooks came up with the idea that Mt. Diablo Boulevard is our town's Mason-Dixon Line (Yikes!) He also  threw out the suggestion that we call the area north of this Mason-Dixon Line our "International District" because of all the "ethnic" restaurants operating there. 

Another suggestion he made, while addressing city and business leaders last week, is that the downtown should ditch its "Escape the Ordinary" logo.  OK, I have to agree with Mr. Brooks there. 

But if Walnut Creek is not going to be promoted as an "escape from the ordinary," how should it be promoted?

Come on, all you creative, closet destination gurus out there. I bet someone reading this blog could come up with something pretty fantastic. The business association is looking for a way to brand this town, so let's see what we can come up.